Bartender: What would you like to drink? Lakhnavi: Thank you for asking, sir. I'll drink whatever you have yourself. Bartender: Thanks, but I'm serving at the bar. I can't drink while I'm working. Lakhnavi: Then I'll wait until you get done to have my first sip. Bartender: My shift doesn't end until after midnight! So, … Continue reading A Lakhnavi walks into a bar…
Probably because he wants to sell a lot of books. I just finished reading The Elephanta Suite, a book comprised of three long stories - "Monkey Hill", "The Elephant God", and "The Gateway of India". On the surface, the stories deal with Americans transported to India who find themselves in complex situations. Unfortunately, these are … Continue reading Why does Paul Theroux hate India?
On my way back from work, I grabbed the pile of uncollected envelopes and catalogs from the mailbox and headed inside. I quickly sorted through the mail, but one particular package buried inside the others stuck out. It was a small package approximately six inches by four inches with a colorful wrapper. I looked for … Continue reading A bargain
A few years ago, an acquaintance of mine who had arrived in the American Midwest for the first time decided to freshen up by taking a shower in my bathroom. Minutes later, after he came out, I noticed that he was shivering like a skinny, wet cat. Puzzled, I asked him what was wrong. He … Continue reading Wrathroom: the perils of the modern bathroom
After spending close to a week on St Thomas in the Caribbean, I came very close to the possibility of being stranded there for an indefinite period. At the small airport in Charlotte Amalie, a few hours before scheduled takeoff, tourists were camping out for the long-haul as airline staff announced over the public address … Continue reading Psyclone
The American television network channel NBC just started airing a television sitcom called Outsourced about a couple of Americans who move to India to run a call-center full of Indians selling novelty items to clients back home in America. I’ve watched the pilot episode and a few others since then. As you know, I'm a desi. … Continue reading A non-review of NBC’s new sitcom “Outsourced”
I stopped when I saw the title of the book – Lord Vishnu’s Love Handles. On the cover was the picture of a cow with long eyelashes and silver udders. But what finally sold me on it was the turban the cow was wearing. I quickly paid the two dollars penciled on the first page … Continue reading Paper still beats the Kindle in my book.
Biologists can be pretty annoying when they’re trying hard to come up with cutesy names. I mean did you guys really have to name a gene required for mammalian development sonic hedgehog after the Sega icon? I mean what comes next? A gene influencing cranial tensile strength named after a pudgy Nintendo chap? But you … Continue reading The Hariome Project
Just as asking a government employee to do something before or after lunch, morning tea, or afternoon tea can get you in trouble, there are other things you should never do either: 1. Never protest when others think you are drunk, insane, stupid, or angry. You will only confirm suspicions. 2. Never admit that your … Continue reading Quick lessons on what not to do in life
Each one of us is born with a gift. I think I’ve finally found mine. I’m invisible. Yes, you heard correctly. I’m invisible. I’m not invisible like Mr. India was in the Bollywood film Mr. India. To claim so would be delusional. In fact, I’m pretty sure that you could see me clearly if you … Continue reading Sense and sensor ability