(Because we all just love stereotypes).
- Your national element is Indium (In), very malleable and soft, but not useful for building long-lasting structures.
- You find it normal for random people to get close on buses, but find the idea that two potential life-partners be allowed to talk unsupervised before being thrust into wedlock, preposterous.
- You expect your children to win dance, music, spelling, and math competitions every year, but don’t pay as much attention to finding out if they are really of sound mind and body.
- You prefer actors in mythological shows who have prominent vaccination scars on their forearms.
- Your prefer Bombay Sapphire gin for your martini over Beefeater not because it tastes better, because you don’t like the name of the latter.
- You work for Tata Wiprosys or know someone who does.
- You need the Supreme Court to judge whether or not two consenting adults have the right to live together outside of marriage, but are pretty sure that cheap fuel is a birthright enshrined in the Indian Constitution.
- You frown upon those who buy “made in India” clothing in India, but not those who buy the same products abroad.
- You know that when a government official is asking for chai-paani he or she is not curious if you brought your hot-water bottle.
- You use the same word for a type of dal and species of deer which likes grass more than dal.
- The memsahibs in your country have given way to another officious class – the memosahibs.
- You translate “mild” to what most Westerners would likely consider Dante’s Inferno on the “spicy-scale”.
- You avoid whole-grain bread, because you prefer white over wheat(ish).
- You would consider purchasing a soft-drink from a vending machine, but only if the coin was inserted for you by a vendor wearing a uniform and a soft baseball cap.
- You feel India needs a “baby” vegetable such as “baby lady’s finger” because the Americans have the “baby carrot” and the Chinese have the “baby corn”.
Disclaimer: I’ve posted many of these thoughts on Twitter.
© Text, 2010-2012, Anirban