All desis living in North America, regardless of country of origin or current citizenship status, hold one truth to be self-evident. As soon as the prospect of visiting relatives in South Asia begins to materialize, we begin the long-winded process of squirreling away trinkets which will be used for gifting purposes. It is as self-evident as paying federal taxes and trying to use dubious means to get the largest return possible. A percentage of any salary must be put aside for purchasing gifts for friends and family.
For desis on temporary tourist, student, or work visas in the United States, the process of collecting items for gifting purposes begins on the flight itself. In fact, many desis have been know to stuff the small barrels of sharp Swiss cheddar or British toffees served during in-flight meals into their carry-on backpacks.
Once past the immigration officers, one of the top priorities of any desi with plans of returning is to create a list of friends and relatives who will be given gifts from America. In the past, paper notebooks were used, but nowadays the use of electronic spreadsheets has become more common. The list must then be cross-checked with advertisement mailings for clearance sales so that large vats of face cream, discount mp3 players, digital camcorders, and bags of American chocolates (preferably with small individually-wrapped pieces for easy distribution) can be purchased at a pittance.
In more innocent times, a visitor could easily get away with fakes. A Ralph Naren Pollo shirt with a chicken embroidered on the chest could be passed off as the more expensive counterpart to unsuspecting bumpkins who were just dying to get their hands on anything phoren.
Not any more. Due to the proliferation of cable television, onsite projects, and the internet, folks are more knowledgeable these days. As a friend boasted, “India is very advanced now. We wear Abercrombie and Tommy Hilfiger. Often genuine too.” I did not have the heart to tell him that the two brands he mentioned had been fingered for racist advertising tendencies. Had I told him, it would probably have made him an even more loyal customer.
In my case, with a multi-city trip to India planned for later this year, I needed to do what any person genetically identifiable as desi would be compelled to do. Toward that goal, I went to the nearest shopping mall to try to find gifting items.
A word about the North American shopping malls to those who are unfamiliar: they are ginormous. In India, it is advisable for family members to have a unique identifiable family song which the children can learn at an early age in case they are separated during melas. In the United States, such songs might be required prior to visits to malls, which in many cases are larger than small towns.
I entered the first department store inside the shopping mall with the goal of buying clothes for friends and family back home. After winding through the gargantuan maze of clothes on offering there, the plan was to next visit the Banana Republic, Gap, Guess, and Benetton stores in the shopping mall.
It seemed like an easy enough task to accomplish, right?
Wrong. I spent over an hour getting progressively frustrated. The problem wasn’t that there was a lack of acceptable clothing. The problem was that none of the clothing that I could find could be purchased.
I started by looking through the Nautica section. I am told by kids these days, that Nautica, which sounds like a raunchy proposition in Bhojpuri, is acceptable for gifting purposes. Every article of clothing that I liked bore the Nautica tag “Made in India” or “Made in Pakistan” or “Made in Bangladesh”. Things got worse when I rummaged through Ralph Lauren, Lacoste, and Tommy Hilfiger. The country of origin of the clothing didn’t vary with the brand at all.
Now, every desi knows that there is no greater crime than purchasing clothes made back home or in neighboring countries. It is a fine thing for white people to do. They drive nice German cars and eat real Italian food. They can afford to contribute to South Asian economies by providing much-needed foreign currency. We do not have that luxury. We need to buy clothes made elsewhere to be better than the poor people in our crowded countries.
I left the department store disgusted, but with a new plan for the Gap store, which I visited next.
I approached a customer service agent. “Hi. Can you please help me find a couple of shirts in ‘Size Large’?” I asked.
“Sure,” said the customer service agent cheerfully, “did you have any color or fit in mind?”
“No, not really” I replied. “In fact, I don’t really care about the cut or design. I just need to buy a couple shirts that aren’t made in India, Pakistan, or Bangladesh.”
The service agent scanned my face expecting me to break out laughing. When it didn’t, he raised his eyebrows. I imagine he must have thought that I was joking. Then he must have thought that I was racist before realizing that I was brown myself. Then he probably gave up and asked again. To which I repeated the request.
After searching through the store for what must have been close to 10 minutes and finding only clothes made in South Asia, there were encouraging signs. “I found a shirt made in Lesotho. I don’t know where that is though…” he said, while looking at me again searching for signs of lunacy.
“Lesotho is a landlocked country surrounded by South Africa,” I interrupted. “It is an African country. We’re making progress but Lesotho’s GDP isn’t that great. Let’s keep looking if there are other countries.”
After searching for another five minutes, we found some shirts made in China and Indonesia. I was hesitant to look at those made in China because the Chinese are known back in India primarily for making cheap Wing-Sun fountain pens, umbrellas, and DVD players.
With Indonesia we had a viable option. “ It isn’t a European country, but Indonesia probably has a higher per capita income than India. Even with the Asian Recession, they must be doing well, “ I thought to myself.
I had spent hours and had made very little progress so I found Indonesia to be an acceptable option. I bought a couple of the shirts made there.
Today I failed, but tomorrow, I will return with my shopping list to resume the search for the remaining gifts. It isn’t easy buying in America for desis.
Text: © Anirban
milkmiracle.net 
Chocolates. Hershey’s Kisses, Ferrero Rocher (sp?), and Reese peanut butter thingies–way to go. Chocolates never fail (though you are now getting most “phoren” chocolates in India).
Also, you could probably get some good winter wear which is probably not going to be made in South Asia, though you should be careful to not get anything TOO warm.
And by the way, electronics are a very good alternative. If you want to spend a little more, get a new and preferably unlocked iPhone. But some good Sony MP3 players will be good too, since Sony doesn’t do MP3 players too well in India. Avoid iPods…too many iPods in Indian stores now…though it’s seen as a cool brand.
I know my advice has been invaluable, but I will help you out there. The value of my advice is a pair of authentic Sennheiser CX-300 earphones. Contact me by email to find out my address. Courier it when you’re in India…national courier charges are not too high. 😛
Haha! Hilarious.
On another note, where are you based Gurdit? Will you be in Bangalore, Mumbai, Pune, or Kolkata in June? If so, I can pick up the Sennheiser cans for you.
(By the way I use Sennheiser earphones too).
That’s a very good question! I have honestly no idea where I’ll be. 🙂
I have received unconfirmed news that I will be starting my job with Procter & Gamble on June 1, but the location is as yet unknown to me. I’m expecting to find out in the next few days, though…
Good post! Faced this same issue while carrying trinkets from Singapore as souvenirs. But it just seems that no matter how much thought we put into it, there will always be a few grumpy faces among the recipients!
Exactly! I put in a lot of effort the first time. Thanks for reading. 🙂
Yankee candles, Lindt chocolates (sold in some stores in Kolkata @ Rs 390 for 100 gm bars. You can 4 oz bars here for $1.25 deals), unbranded creams and shampoos made in Argentina and Mexico, branded cosmetics made in USA and EU that you may get here @ bargain price, any small electronic goods (take the “Made in USA sticker from Yankee Candles product and paste on the electronic item).
If you are unfortunate enough to have an aunt who considers anything less worthy than a Porsche 911 as NOT a gift, buy a Porsche 911.
Haha… spoken like a true expert. 🙂
Because being a student does not afford me the luxury of saving up too much money before I make my annual trip back to the homeland, I very rarely bring back clothes. Its almost always chocolates, electronics, and beauty products.
Here’s my suggestion: find the nearest Costco and you’re in business. Bed, Bath and Beyond and Bath and Body works are relatively cheap places to get fragrances, lotions, etc.
My dad once brought a calculator for me from Zimbabwe (way before its Mugabe days) – i opened it excitedly only to turn it around and discover ‘Made in India’ ……..Now it happens on a regular basis when any phoren relative visits. The supporters of Swadesi movement during British Raj would have been proud today 🙂
I have been to a few countries and american malls are as tasteless, drab and boring as can be, and that goes from NYC to DC to Nashville and other small towns. I hardly go to malls here in the US and try to shop local. The best gifts I have found for family and friends back home are from local artists and craftsmen and farmer’s markets.
But I do not understand why so many people living abroad have such a feeling of superiority when giving gifts to families and friends “back home.” With markets opening up, and better salaries, Indians can afford equally good products as in the US. As you pointed out, most gifts are trinkets and money-savers and hardly quality products, such as Chanel or Christian Dior.
I once saw a Tommy Hifelfinger backpack in Mexico and an “ike” shirt with the swoosh under the “ike” in China. I try to buy trinkets from trips that make no sense, one of my favorites being a nail clipper with the Eiffel Tower on it (Paris) purchased in Mexico, with a “made in China” stamp on the back. Such “gifts” may result in people never wanting a souvenir from me in the future.
Omg dis is hilarious…. Mela song… :p m gonna be visiting home (Mumbai) in couple on months… First trip back home and I have a huge family… As in a head count of 150 and u know how it goes… I can’t leave out anyone… I’m already budgeting the gifts n my mind… And u get everything in India now so I don’t know if even cosmetics or perfumes r a Gud option… All Indian malls have everything phoren and Indians buy it nowadays on regular basis… Your guess bags… Yes saint Laurent lipstick… Body shop… Tommy Hilfiger … So wot to buy ?! Plus with clothes thris dis size issue… I was thinking maybe I can buy Hershey’s chocolates, some typical stuff from NYC like those art stuff they put out for tourists…and chewing gums and mints coz they r awesome out here… True u get the cobalt gum for 300 bucks at a nearby Gujarati Mithai shop in Mumbai and Hershey’s kisses for another 500 but they r still Gud quality stuff…. Yeah ppl will always expect more so maybe I will pay a visit to sephora and buy those value packs like 6 lipsticks in one bag and 10 glosses in another and then I would just separate them n use it for some really near and dear ones….. Oh and I also that that those smuckers and welsh farm fruit preserves r tasty so will take some small bottles of those packed in bubble wrap as they r glass bottles … Is this a Gud list
I am truly delighted to read this website posts which consists
of tons of valuable facts, thanks for providing these data.
>> “The service agent scanned my face expecting me to break out laughing. When it didn’t, he raised his eyebrows”
Ha ha ha
Hi admin, i must say you have hi quality posts here.
Your blog should go viral. You need initial traffic boost only.
How to get it? Search for: Mertiso’s tips go viral
I am going through the same problem currently. I will be visiting Kolkata in Januray of 2020. I have already started sorting things in my head on what to buy. I am thinking tablets, chocolates, and specific things like a Houston Rockets cap, Shirt, or NFL jersey.